x
Toggle Content Register or Login  -  November 17, 2024, 2:29 pm
Toggle Content User Info

Welcome Anonymous

Nickname
Password

Membership:
Latest: LucilleDZ
New Today: 0
New Yesterday: 0
Overall: 2016

People Online:
Members: 0
Visitors: 96
Total: 96
Who Is Where:
 Visitors:
01: Community Forums
02: Community Forums
03: Community Forums
04: Community Forums
05: Community Forums
06: Community Forums
07: Stories Archive
08: Community Forums
09: Community Forums
10: Home
11: Community Forums
12: Community Forums
13: Community Forums
14: Home
15: Community Forums
16: Community Forums
17: Community Forums
18: Community Forums
19: Home
20: Community Forums
21: Community Forums
22: Community Forums
23: Stories Archive
24: Community Forums
25: Home
26: Community Forums
27: Community Forums
28: Home
29: Community Forums
30: Community Forums
31: Community Forums
32: Community Forums
33: Home
34: Statistics
35: Home
36: Community Forums
37: Community Forums
38: Community Forums
39: Community Forums
40: Community Forums
41: Home
42: Community Forums
43: Community Forums
44: Community Forums
45: Community Forums
46: Home
47: Community Forums
48: Community Forums
49: Community Forums
50: Community Forums
51: Community Forums
52: Home
53: Community Forums
54: Community Forums
55: Stories Archive
56: Community Forums
57: Community Forums
58: Community Forums
59: Community Forums
60: Home
61: My Account
62: Community Forums
63: Community Forums
64: Community Forums
65: Stories Archive
66: Community Forums
67: Stories Archive
68: Community Forums
69: Photo Gallery
70: Community Forums
71: Community Forums
72: Statistics
73: Community Forums
74: Community Forums
75: Home
76: Community Forums
77: Community Forums
78: Community Forums
79: Community Forums
80: Community Forums
81: Community Forums
82: Statistics
83: Community Forums
84: Community Forums
85: Home
86: Community Forums
87: Community Forums
88: Home
89: Home
90: Community Forums
91: Statistics
92: Community Forums
93: Statistics
94: Community Forums
95: Community Forums
96: My Account

Staff Online:

No staff members are online!
Toggle Content Main Menu
Toggle Content Last Posts
Last 10 Forum Messages

translation help needed please
Last post by yesindd in Translations on Jul 15, 2024 at 20:59:53

bocca
Last post by tennino in General Discussion Groups on Jan 16, 2021 at 15:56:41

Towns in Frosinone that were part of former Vatican States a
Last post by Italysearcher in Central Italy on Feb 19, 2019 at 08:15:58

Dual Citizenship
Last post by Curci-Ghio in General Discussion Groups on Nov 18, 2018 at 14:30:54

Please Help Translate Letter
Last post by nuccia in Translations on Oct 20, 2018 at 06:18:43

Family in Cittanova
Last post by russojoseph1 in Translations on Oct 14, 2018 at 12:28:20

DNA Testing
Last post by nuccia in General Discussion Groups on Sep 29, 2018 at 10:39:30

Trento -Atto di Nascita - Frazione di Poia, Comune di Comano
Last post by exevans in Northern Italy on Mar 28, 2018 at 00:45:37

Translating written postcard
Last post by mekanic in Translations on Jan 18, 2018 at 12:58:50

Translating written postcard
Last post by mekanic in Translations on Jan 18, 2018 at 12:53:38

Toggle Content Help Support this Site
Please support GentediMareGenealogy
Help us by supporting the future development of this site, or simply to say thank you.
Toggle Content EStore
Community Forums › Just For Fun › Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only › Blondes

     Forum FAQ   Search   Log in to check your private messages   Login  
Blondes
Jokes are posted in fun and as the Heading suggests, only clean content allowed. So go on and have a laugh...

Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum Index Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only Printer Friendly Page

View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
carnie
Joker
Joker


Joined: Jul 12, 2007
Posts: 443
Location: Barnsley. South Yorks.

PostPosted: Wed May 25, 2011 8:31 am    Post subject: Blondes Reply with quote

A Blonde was sent on her way to Heaven. Upon arrival, a concerned St Peter met her at the Pearly Gates.

'I'm sorry, 'St Peter said; 'But Heaven is suffering from an overload of goodly souls and we have been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for new arrivals to ease the burden of Heavenly Arrivals.'

'That's cool' said the blonde, 'What does the Entrance Exam consist of?'




'Just three questions' said St Peter.




'Which are?' asked the blonde.




'The first,' said St Peter, 'is, which two days of the week start with the letter 'T'




'The second is 'How many seconds are there in a year?'




'The third is 'What was the name of the swag-man in Waltzing Matilda?'




'Now,' said St Peter, 'Go away and think about those questions and when I call upon you, I shall expect you to have those answers for me.'




So the blonde went away and gave those three questions some considerable thought (I expect you to do the same).




The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and asked if she had considered the questions, to which she replied, 'I have.'




'Well then,' said St Peter, 'Which two days of the week start with the letter T?'




The blonde said, 'Today and Tomorrow.'




St Peter pondered this answer for some time, and decided that indeed the answer can be applied to the question.




'Well then, could I have your answer to the second of the three questions?'




St Peter went on, 'how many seconds in a year?'




The Blonde replied, 'Twelve!'




'Only twelve?' exclaimed St Peter, 'How did you arrive at that figure?'




'Easy,' said the blonde, 'there's the second of January, the second of February, right through to the second of December, giving a total of twelve seconds.'




St Peter looked at the blonde and said, 'I need some time to consider your answer before I can give you a decision.'




And he walked away shaking his head.




A short time later, St Peter returned to the Blonde.




'I'll allow the answer to stand, but you need to get the third and final question absolutely correct to be allowed into Heaven.




Now, can you tell me the answer to the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'




The blonde replied; 'Of the three questions, I found this the easiest to answer.'




'Really!' exclaimed St Peter, 'And what is the answer?'




'It's Andy.'




'Andy?''




'Yes, Andy,' said the blonde.




This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that, deliberating the answer.




Finally, he could not stand the suspense any longer, and turning to the blonde, asked 'How in God's name did you arrive at THAT answer?'




'Easy' said the blonde, 'Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited til his billy boiled.'




And the blonde entered Heaven...









And what's worse .. you're now singing it to yourself .....
Back to top
View user's profile Send e-mail
  Page 1 of 1All times are GMT - 4 Hours

Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum Index Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only Printer Friendly Page

  
 
Jump to:  



You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum



Hosted By Site5.com
The logos and trademarks used on this site are the property of Gente di Mare Genealogy.
We are not responsible for comments posted by our users, as they are the opinions of the poster.
Interactive software released under GNU GPL, Code Credits, Privacy Policy
TCD_ItalianGene © Gente di Mare Genealogy