A man sees a sign in front of a house advertising a "Talking Dog for Sale".
The man rings the doorbell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back
garden. The guy goes out to the garden and sees a black mutt just sitting
there.
"Is it true that your talk?" he asks. "Certainly can!" the dog replies.
"Wow. That's amazing. How did it happen?"
The dog looks up and says, "Well I discovered my gift of talking when I was just a pup, and as I always wanted to help the government, I told M15 about my gift and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.
I was one of their most valuable spies for five years running.
Eventually the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't
getting any younger, so I decided to settle down.
I was signed up for a job at Heathrow to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near the cargo sheds looking out for suspicious characters and listening into their conversations. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and received a special medal from the Queen.
Then I met a sexy bitch, had a litter of puppies and now I'm just enjoying
retirement."
The guy is totally amazed and runs back and asks the owner what he will take for the dog. The owner says "Ten quid".
The guy says, "Ten quid!!! But your dog is amazing. Why on earth are you
selling him so cheap?".
The owner replies, "Cause he's a liar. He's never done
half of that
stuff!".
PS - the laughing dog is my mutt 'Ciccio?!